Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Mummy 3: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor Review

Howdy Folks,

I'm gonna try something new this week, as asking you kiddos to download a weekly podcast that's nearly 2 hours long seems to be asking a lot. Everyone says they "don't have two hours to listen to a free radio show" but then they go out and spend money and over two hours to watch terrible movies that are far less entertaining than hearing great music and listen to me poke fun at stuff. This time around, I'm clipping out just my review of the Mummy. So that way you only have to listen to 10 minutes of the good stuff, and I don't have to give myself carpel tunnel from typing furiously about how a movie made me want to choke people.

With that said, feel free to download the review below, and play the following game while you listen. It's called "What movie is this image from!?" and it's a lot of fun, you'll see.

And if you're still too lazy to download the audio and laugh your ass off, then I'll just say that the movie wasn't very good, and you're no fun.


Why must Jet Li and Michelle Yeoh always be pointing swords and stuff at people? It's almost as stereotypically offensive as a Charlie Chan movie...


Atardicorp Studios said...

I liked the 1st Mummy despite it's shortcomings. No way I'm ever watching this one though. Thanks 4 the warning.

The Boom Operator said...

Yep, I loved the first one, and even enjoyed the second one quite a bit. This one really let me down.

Anonymous said...

The one star I plopped on this clunky bore-athon is due to the presence of the great Jet Li as the evil Dragon Emperor of the subtitle and the gorgeous Michelle Yeoh as Zi Yuan, a witch who's been on the Emperor¹s ass for over 2000 years.

Peter Travers
Rolling Stone

http://www.rollingstone.com/reviews/movie/22126971/review/22126827/the _mummy_tomb_of_the_dragon_emperor

martial-arts superstar Jet Li triumphs as the mostly wordless evil Emperor Han of ancient China, a glowing magma spirit locked in a terra cotta shell.

Jane Horwitz
Washington Post

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/07/31/AR2008 073100734.html

Still, Li makes a great villain, using his powers to create fire, ice and other elements.

Edward Douglas
Coming Soon

Toward the end of The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, Jet Li and Michelle Yeoh launch into a vigorous sword fight — and what a grand pleasure it is to watch these two world-class stars in action again...Their duel atop the Great Wall of China is a reunion of titans, an Old Timers' Day for two actor-athletes still in their sinuous prime. Forgive the effusions of an alter-kocker fanboy, but the flinty glamour of Li and Yeoh — buttressed by the stolid, sneering presence of top Hong Kong villain Anthony Wong Chau-sang (who in 1993 appeared in 15 films!) — is the best reason to catch this third in the series of Indiana Jones knockoffs.

Richard Corliss

A memorably badass Jet Li.
Nathan Rabin
AV Club

The Boom Operator said...

See? The only reason to see this movie is to see exactly more of the same stuff those two have already done several times over.

Too bad the same didn't apply to Brendan Fraser...